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Friday, September 30, 2016

This is our Brain

This is our Brain 


Ambulance ! - Joke


A Woman called for an ambulance..
Operator: How may I help you?
Woman: I banged my toe against the coffee table and hurt it real bad.
Operator: And you want to call an ambulance for that?
Woman: No. The ambulance is for my husband. He shouldn't have laughed like that......
πŸ˜³πŸ˜³πŸ˜€

Thursday, September 29, 2016

World Heart Day 2016

World Heart Day 2016




Tuesday, September 27, 2016

A Mathematician and an Engineer - Joke


A mathematician and an engineer are stranded on a desert island. Along with them, are several boxes of canned food. Try as they might, they were unable to bust open of the cans with the rocks that were available. Finally, the engineer decides to explore the rest of the island to try to find food or something to help open the cans.

Several hours later the engineer arrives back at the camp sight to find the mathematician eating a can of peaches, with several empty cans lying around.

"How did you open the cans?" asks the befuddled engineer.

"Easy," says the mathematician. "First, I assumed there was a can opener..."

A Mathematician and an Engineer - Joke


A mathematician and an engineer are stranded on a desert island. Along with them, are several boxes of canned food. Try as they might, they were unable to bust open of the cans with the rocks that were available. Finally, the engineer decides to explore the rest of the island to try to find food or something to help open the cans.

Several hours later the engineer arrives back at the camp sight to find the mathematician eating a can of peaches, with several empty cans lying around.

"How did you open the cans?" asks the befuddled engineer.

"Easy," says the mathematician. "First, I assumed there was a can opener..."

Saturday, September 24, 2016

Wife and Newspaper - Joke


Wife asked her husband to give the newspaper ....

Husband: How backward you are? Technology has developed so much and you are still asking for the newspaper ... ???
Take my iPad ....

Wife took the iPad and killed the Cockroach

Husband faints

*Moral:*Whatever the wife asks, give her without argument.
Show your smartness in your office only ....

Friday, September 23, 2016

Perfect Kissing Guide, Even For Experienced Kissers

Perfect Kissing Guide, Even For Experienced Kissers


1. Kissing It Softly

Start kissing slowly, gently and passionately. After that, keep it up.


2. The Strawberry Kiss

Recent studies indicate that eating a strawberry before kissing will make your kissing experience into a real magic, as the strawberry have a huge impact on your lips sweet sensor.

3. Love Is Hurt

Use your other body parts while you kiss. Touch her/his hair, hold him/her back, touch his muscles and more. This action releases tons of endorphins, which makes you feel so good...


4. Nibble It a Little Bit

Nibble each other lips (gently of course) will boost your kissing experience and even the after kissing celebrations...

5. Moisturize Your Kiss

It's well known that dry lips will destroy every kiss, avoid it by using some lip moisture once in awhile.

6. Hip, Lip - Hop!

Get your hips closer, it will ignite some fire between you... Smoking!

7. Same Same But Different

Mimic each other "moves", whether s/he bite your lips, puting the tongue inside and more.


8. Tongue It Up

Take your tongue for a ride over your partner's front teeth. It might sound disgusting, but you should expect for an overwhelming response.

9. Lips Is The Obvious

Kiss on other body parts as well - neck, shoulders, ears.... it's up to you.

10. Keep It Fresh

No matter which tactic you are using, nothing will work if your teeth will be smelly and dirty. Brush your teeth twice a day! (At least...)


http://www.viralands.com/

Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Marion Cotillard - The mysterious French beauty behind Jolie - Pitt divorce ??

Marion Cotillard - The mysterious French beauty behind Jolie - Pitt divorce ??

Angelina dumped Brad after private eye uncovered Marion Cotillard affair - Reports say. 
And, these are the images of the Hottest searched lady of this Biggest celebrity divorce drama.












BRANGELINA - A TIMELINE OF A VERY HOLLYWOOD ROMANCE

BRANGELINA - A TIMELINE OF A VERY HOLLYWOOD ROMANCE



May 2004 : Although Brad is married to Jennifer Aniston at the time, rumours of an on-set romance swirl after Pitt and Angelina Jolie start filming Mr & Mrs Smith.

January 2005 : Brad and Jennifer announce in a joint statement that after 'much thoughtful consideration' they had decided to split. They add: 'We happily remain committed and caring friends with great love and admiration for one another.'

March 2005 : Jennifer files for divorce citing 'irreconcilable differences' as speculation about Brad and Angelina's romance continued.

April 2005 : Brad and Angelina's relationship is confirmed after paparazzi photographs of them on holiday in Kenya with her son Maddox surfaced. They have yet to speak publicly about it.

July 2005 : Jennifer is reportedly left heartbroken when Brad and Angelina take part in a revealing photoshoot for W magazine entitled Domestic Bliss. The photo essay shows them as a couple with children. Later that month Angelina adopts her second child, daughter Zahara, from Ethiopia.

September 2005 : Jennifer slams Brad as having a 'sensitivity chip missing' following the W photo shoot, which he brainstormed.

October 2005 : Brad and Aniston's divorce is finalized.

January 2006 : Angelina and Brad announce she is pregnant with their first child while Brad applies to formally adopt her children Maddox and Zahara.

May 2006 : The couple's first biological child Shiloh Nouvel Jolie-Pitt born in Swakopmund, Namibia.

December 2006 : Angelina tells Vogue that while filming Mr & Mrs Smith, she couldn't 'wait to get to work' to see Brad. Two years later, Jennifer brands the comments 'uncool.'

March 2007 : Jolie adopts three-year-old Pax Thien from Vietnam.

May 2008 : At the Cannes Film Festival, Angelina confirms she is expecting twins. Knox Leon and Vivienne Marcheline are born in July.

October 2008 : Angelina reveals her romance with Brad began while he was married to Jennifer as she says they 'fell in love' on the set of Mr & Mrs Smith. The pair had always maintained up until this point that their relationship only started after he split from Jennifer.\

September 2011 : Brad tells Parade magazine that before Angelina he 'wasn't living an interesting life.' He added: 'I think that my marriage had something to do with it. Trying to pretend the marriage was something that it wasn't.' He said he's finally a 'satisfied man' with Angelina. He later insisted the comments were misunderstood, adding: 'Jen is an incredibly giving, loving, and hilarious woman who remains my friend.'

December 2011/January 2012 : The couple admit in separate interviews that the children are encouraging them to marry. While they had planned to wait until gay marriage was legal, they reveal the pressure from the children is strong.

April 2012 : Brad and Angelina reveal their engagement.

February 2013 : Angelina has a secret double mastectomy after discovering she had a defective BRCA-1 gene that put her at high risk of developing breast and ovarian cancers. She tells the world about it in a New York Times Op Ed in May.

July 2014 : It is announced that Brad and Angelina will reunite on the big screen for the first time since Mr & Mrs Smith. Jolie will write and direct – the 'intimate, character-driven drama' By the Sea.

August 2014 : The couple tie the knot in a secret ceremony at Chateau Miraval in France and after a short family honeymoon in Nice, the Jolie-Pitts head to Malta to start shooting By The Sea.

September 2016 : Angelina files for divorce citing irreconcilable differences.  


http://www.dailymail.co.uk/


Tuesday, September 20, 2016

How your Body Language tells about you

How your Body Language tells about you 



Monday, September 19, 2016

What is the date today? - Joke

When I reached hospital,
I got a call from my wife...
"what is the date today?"
I was wondering..😳
then told her 11th September...
call disconnected...
i was wondering..her birthday?



No...mine...No... anniversary...no..
son's birthday ...no...
in laws birthday anniversary...
no...gas booking..done...utility payments done...
her uncle who arrives when we want to go out, sqat and kill us and our time...his birthday ...no... Then?!
Why date??? Lunch and evening tea went with spinning questions...reached home...
Junior was playing in car park... Asked him....how is the weather in kitchen? Tornado... tsunami???...
Boy told " all normal. Why?".." your mom asked me..what is the date today in the morning?"...
Boy smiled and told me..." I tore some sheets from calendar in morning...
She was confused..". Haaaa... πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜ŽπŸ˜Ž
*Being husband is a toughest job.* πŸ˜€πŸ˜ŽπŸ˜ƒπŸ˜‚

Sunday, September 18, 2016

Wives are of two types..

Wives are of two types:

The first type listens to her husband, understands his thoughts, always behaving lovingly, and even if the husband is angry, keeps smiling.😊
.
The second type...
.
.
.
.
.
.
..is the one that everyone has😜

Thursday, September 15, 2016

5 meaningful ways to express to show your beloved your true feelings

5 meaningful ways to express to show your beloved your true feelings

Wednesday, September 14, 2016

Cat Quotes

Man has always been intrigued and fascinated with the cat so it's not surprising that there are so many cat-related quotes throughout time. This is a selection of some of my favourite quotes that I have collected over the years that I know all feline lovers will enjoy.
This page will be updated with new quotes from time to time so please feel free to come back again soon!



"In the beginning, God created man, but seeing him so feeble, He gave him the cat."
- Warren Eckstein
"A home without a cat- and a well-fed, well-petted and properly revered cat- may be a perfect home, perhaps, but how can it prove title?"
- Pudd'nhead Wilson
"If animals could speak the dog would be a a blundering outspoken fellow, but the cat would have the rare grace of never saying a word too much."
- Mark Twain
"A cat is more intelligent than people believe, and can be taught any crime."
-Mark Twain Notebook, 1895
"I simply can't resist a cat, particularly a purring one. They are the cleanest, cunningest, and most intelligent things I know, outside of the girl you love, of course."
- Abroad with Mark Twain and Eugene Field, Fisher
"Of all God's creatures there is only one that cannot be made the slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve man, but it would deteriorate the cat."
- Mark Twain Notebook, 1894
"You can keep a dog; but it is the cat who keeps people, because cats find humans useful domestic animals."
- George Mikes from "How to be decadent
"Dogs come when they're called. Cats take a message and get back to you."
- Mary Bly
"For a man to truly understand rejection, he must first be ignored by a cat."
- Anon
"I love cats because I love my home and after a while they become its visible soul."
- Jean Cocteau
"There are two means of refuge from the misery of life - music and cats."
- Albert Schweitzer
"There are few things in life more heartwarming than to be welcomed by a cat."
- Tay Hohoff
" God made the cat in order that humankind might have the pleasure of caressing the tiger."
- Fernand Mery
"There are few things in life more heartwarming than to be welcomed by a cat."
- Tay Hohoff
"Cats are smarter than dogs. You can't get eight cats to pull a sled through snow. "
- Jeff Valdez
"Way down deep, we're all motivated by the same urges. Cats have the courage to live by them."
- Jim Davis
"There is, incidentally, no way of talking about cats that enables one to come off as a sane person."
- Dan Greenberg
"The smallest feline is a masterpiece."
- Leonardo da Vinci
"In a cat's eye, all things belong to cats."
- English Proverb
"Beware of people who dislike cats."
- Irish Proverb
"You will always be lucky if you know how to make friends with strange cats."
- Colonial American Proverb
"With the qualities of cleanliness, affection, patience, dignity, and courage that cats have, how many of us, I ask you, would be capable of becoming cats?"
- Fernand Mery
"I like pigs. Dogs look up to us. Cats look down on us. Pigs treat us as equals."
- Winston Churchill
"I have studied many philosophers and many cats. The wisdom of cats is infinitely superior."
- Hippolyte Taine
"A meow massages the heart."
- Stuart McMillan
"No matter how much cats fight, there always seems to be plenty of kittens."
- Abraham Lincoln
"Dogs believe they are human. Cats believe they are God."
- Unknown
"Time spent with cats is never wasted."
- Unknown
"Women and cats will do as they please, and men and dogs should relax and get used to the idea."
- Unknown
" No heaven will not ever be Heaven be; Unless my cats are there to welcome me."
- Unknown
" How we behave toward cats here below determines our status in heaven."
- Robert A. Heinlein
"Dogs have owners, cats have staff."
- Unknown
"Thousands of years ago, cats were worshipped as gods. Cats have never forgotten this."
- Anonymous
" There are many intelligent species in the universe. They are all owned by cats."
- Anonymous
"No amount of time can erase the memory of a good cat, and no amount of masking tape can ever totally remove his fur from your couch."
- Leo Dworken
"One cat just leads to another."
- Ernest Hemingway
"The cat has too much spirit to have no heart."
- Ernest Menaul
"As every cat owner knows, nobody owns a cat."
- Ellen Perry Berkeley
"People who hate cats, will come back as mice in their next life."
- Faith Resnick
"One reason we admire cats is for their proficiency in one-upmanship. They always seem to come out on top, no matter what they are doing, or pretend they do."
- Barbara Webster
"I have noticed that what cats most appreciate in a human being is not the ability to produce food which they take for granted--but his or her entertainment value."
- Geoffrey Household


"As anyone who has ever been around a cat for any length of time well knows cats have enormous patience with the limitations of the human kind."
- Cleveland Amory

Tuesday, September 13, 2016

45 Ultimate Tips For Men


  1. Buy high quality tools, so you only have to buy them once.
  2. Keep a change of clothes at work.
  3. Never hit anyone unless they are an immediate threat.
  4. Every hat should serve a purpose.
  5. Never take her to the movies on the first date.
  6. Learn to wet shave.
  7. Nothing looks more bad ass than a well-tailored suit.
  8. Shave with the grain on the first go-around.
  9. Always look a person in the eye when you talk to them.
  10. Buy a plunger before you need a plunger.
  11. Exercise makes you happy. Run, lift, and play sports.
  12. Brush your teeth before you put on your tie.
  13. A small amount of your paycheck should go directly to your savings account every month.
  14. Call Mom and Dad every week.
  15. Never wear a clip-on tie.
  16. Give a firm handshake.
  17. Compliment her shoes.
  18. Never leave a beer unfinished.
  19. If you aren’t confident, fake it. It will come around.
  20. You can tell the size of a man by the size of things that bother him.
  21. Be conscious of your body language.
  22. The only reason to ever point a gun at someone is if you intend to shoot them. Period.
  23. Always stand to shake someone’s hand.
  24. Never lend anything you can’t afford to lose.
  25. Ask more than you answer. Everybody likes to talk about themselves.
  26. Never have sex with anyone that doesn’t want it as much as you.
  27. Go for women out of your league. You may end up surprised.
  28. Manliness is not only being able to take care of yourself, but others as well.
  29. Go with the decision that will make for a good story.
  30. When you walk, look straight ahead, not at your feet.
  31. Nice guys don’t finish last, boring guys do.
  32. Find your passion and figure out how to get paid for it.
  33. Don’t let the little head do the thinking for the big head.
  34. No matter their job or status, everyone deserves your respect.
  35. The most important thing you can learn is personal responsibility. Bad things happen, it’s your job to overcome them.
  36. The first one to get angry loses.
  37. A man does what needs to be done without complaining.
  38. Never stop learning.
  39. Always go out into public dressed like you’re about to meet the love of your life.
  40. Don’t change yourself just to make someone happy.
  41. If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room.
  42. Luck favors the prepared.
  43. Women find confidence sexy as hell.
  44. Do whatever you want to do, but be the best at it.
  45. No one is on their deathbed wishing they spent more time at work.
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