Men & Women

Friendship between women:

A woman doesn't come home one night.

The next day she tells her husband that she had slept over at a girlfriend's house.

The husband calls his wife's 10 best friends. None of them know anything about it.

Friendship between men:

A man doesn't come home one night.

The next day he tells his wife that he had slept over at a friend's house.

The wife calls her husband's 10 best men friends. Eight of them confirm that he had slept over, and two claim that he was still there.

Ha ha ha

A couple is dressed and ready to go out for the evening.
They phone for a cab, turn on a night light, cover their pet parakeet and put the cat out in the back yard.

The taxi arrives, and they open the front door to leave.

Suddenly the cat they put out scoots back into the house.
They don't want the cat shut in there because she always tries to eat the bird.

The wife goes out to the taxi while the husband goes back in.
The cat runs upstairs, with the man in hot pursuit.

The wife doesn't want the driver to know the house will be empty.
She explains to the taxi driver that her husband will be out soon.

"He's just going upstairs to say goodbye to my mother."

A few minutes later the husband gets into the cab.

"Sorry I took so long," he says, as they drive away.
"Stupid hag was hiding under the bed. Had to poke her with a coat hanger to get her to come out! Then I had to wrap her in a blanket to keep her from scratching me. But it worked. I hauled her fat butt downstairs and threw her out into the back yard!

The cab driver hit a parked car. 

Random Thoughts

We love ourselves even after doing many mistakes. Then how can we hate       others for their one mistake. Think before you hate someone or hate         yourself.                                                                                                                                              Swimming along the flow is effortless but swimming against it needs          effort. Don't go the way life takes you, but take life the way you want to  go. Dare to be different.                                                                                                                                The greatest advantage of speaking the truth is that you don't have to      remember what you said. Think about it. There is only ONE truth.                                                                                                                  A beautiful saying: If your eyes are positive you would like all the        people in the world. But if your tongue is positive all the people in the    world like you.                                                                                                                                          Life is about the art of drawing without an eraser, so be careful while      taking decisions about the most valuable pages of your life.                                                                                            A nice thought: I met money and said why everyone runs behind you, you are  just a piece of paper. Money smiled and said of-course I am just a piece    of paper, but I haven't seen a dustbin yet in my whole life.                                                                                            Life is like a coin. Pleasure and Pain are the two sides. Only one side is  visible at a time. But remember other side is also waiting for it's turn.                                                                                If you like someone, show it. It will be sweeter than telling. But if you  don't like someone. Just tell it. It will be less painful than showing it.                                                                              A very true but strange quote: Love doesn't start in morning & end in        evening. It starts when you don't need it & ends when you need it most.                                                                                  What's greater than mom's love? Which pillow is better than a lover's lap?    Which company's better than friends? There are some things in life with no  substitutes. Love them forever.                                                                                                                          Tragedy of moon: So simple but so attractive. So enlightening but so cool.  So moving but so still. So quiet but so popular. So romantic but still      single.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                A girl loved a boy so much. One day she proposed to him. But he refused.    Still she was not sad. Her friends asked her, didn't you feel bad? She        said, why should I feel bad? I lost the one who never loved me. But he      lost the one who truly loved him.