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Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Matrimonial Ads



Matrimonial ads



FISHERMAN
Wife wanted, must be able to dig, clean, cook worms
and clean fish. Must have own boat with motor. Please
send photograph of motorboat.

SALESMAN
Once in a lifetime offer, to get yourself the
original, genuine article. One of the most handsome and
smartest bachelor's around is now looking for a wife.
And you could be the lucky one he chooses! Has own
house, car and successful career!

ECONOMIST
I am in demand of a wife. Supply is great though my
requirements are high. However the Elasticity of my
demands should not bear too heavy a burden
upon the national interest.

MATHEMATICIAN
Wife required to complete the formula of my life. Must
be numerate and understand complex algebraic
logarithms. Needed to help further my family
unit.

IT CONSULTANT
Well there is definite room for improvement in my
life. The speed of my current flows of information and
processes is slowing down and the injection of a wife
into my life is bound to improve efficiency.
Compatibility could be an issue.

BUSINESS MAN
Wife wanted for company.

POLITICIAN
I feel there is a need in this world, to improve the
ways we live, to harmonize the processes of life and
to build upon past differences and short comings. I
believe that we the people need someone to share our
lives. To feel the joys of parent hood, and bear the
social responsibilities, as we should in a civilized
society..... ......... ... (etc
etc and never getting to the point)

CAR DEALER
Wanted a sturdy, reliable, low depreciating wife.
Should be in excellent working condition. Resale value also important!

FARMER
Wanted a wife from good stock. Required for breeding.

LAWYER
I hereby propose to solicit myself as an eligible
candidate for the post of wife after marriage. The
person whom I'm looking for should be strictly -a
girl. The girl should be strictly a girl, with
evidence to support this view that she is a girl. The
girl should be willing to surrender to the service and
jurisdiction of My Lord i.e. Myself. Any objections
would be overruled and will not be sustained. Apply in
limited confidence as all liabilities are null and
void in the event of failure on our part of any
kind whatsoever.

PILOT
Wife required to complete my life. Please, only level
headed applicants. She must not have her heads in the
clouds, but have her feet firmly on the
ground. Her heart must be in it for the long haul. And
she absolutely must also be aerodynamically sound!!!


BANKER
Wanted wife who takes interest in me and credits me
with her service.


ACCOUNTANT
Required a girl - 5'8' & 36' 24' 36' with a good head
for figures. She must
be averse to making unnecessary expenditure and her
very nature should be
one of generating as few expenses in my life as
possible. She should profit
from a nice personality and be a credit to her family.

SHARABI
Wanted a girl. Girl's father should preferably have a
spirits factory. I am an occasional alcoholic who
drinks only when friends come round. Friends
come round only seven times a week. Girl preferred who
can carry me from bar to ghar-bar. Meet personally in
a bar or send drinks for trial. Sample should be
ample.

MINICAB DRIVER
Hello! Hello! number 9 calling. This is number 9 I'm
calling from x-ud, a wife is needed to pick me
up. Driving license not necessary, but map
reading skills are a bonus.


BUILDER
Wanted a wife to help build upon the foundations of my
life. Must be homely
and willing to build relationship from the ground up.

DOCTOR
I am looking for a wife to cure the emptiness in my
life. However if you feel the need for a second
opinion then it's fine by me.

ARMY COMMANDO
My mission in life is to find myself the perfect wife.
Successful applicants must be able to use a penknife
and a compass. She who dares
wins. Camouflage provided.

RACE CAR DRIVER
A model wife required to fit in with my fast track
life. Must be able to
keep pace!

ASTRONAUT
I'm searching for a wife to fill the space in my life.
Someone to share my universe. Must have looks that are
out of this world


Friday, November 11, 2011

11 11 11 - Special Post


11 11 11 



How often have you noticed the numbers 11:11, 12:12, 10:10, 22:22, 12:34, 2:22, 3:33, 4:44 or 5:55 popping up all over the place? These number sequences are not necessarily only time prompts. They can also be number sequences, like 333, 1111 etc. To your mind, is this a coincidence, or are they too frequent to be random? Perhaps you are puzzled or amused by this phenomenon? Possibly even a little bit nervous? The question everyone is asking is "What does 11:11 mean?" and "Is there a reason for this?" And there certainly is.

Millions of folks all around the world are now seeing these amazing 11:11 prompts. They are folks of all colours, all religions, all beliefs. It's spreading, and becoming far more common; it's become a major phenomenon. Someone or something is causing all these folks to look at clocks, number plates, phone numbers or any source of numbers even when they make no effort themselves to look for these things. You can even change your clocks in the house, and you will still be prompted, at the "wrong" time. You can't stop it, because YOU aren't doing it. Sometimes you will even see these numbers flashing after a power outage, even though digital clocks are supposed to reset to 12:00, not 11:11 or 12:12!






http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/45195313/ns/technology_and_science-science/t/whats-so-special-about/#.TryQBPQik5s



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