The History Of No Shave November

As November quickly approaches, a lazy darkness settles over College Park and another kind of darkness is creeping onto the faces of men across campus: facial hair.

Nov. 1 marks the start of Movember (a word blend of “mustache” and “November”) or No Shave November, an annual month-long event in which men refrain from shaving and allow their beards and 'staches to grow wild and free.

University students are just some among millions of men in the nation partaking in Movember.

“I’m not sure exactly why No Shave November exists,” said Franco Frega, a freshman enrolled in Letters and Sciences. “I’m participating to celebrate my new college freedom. My mom isn’t here to tell me to shave anymore.”

“[Movember] gives me a reason to be lazy,” remarked freshman history major Alexander Selengut, another student participating in the 30-day event.

While Movember provides students with the perfect opportunity to embrace their newfound college freedom or excuse to be lazy, the event’s actual history and purpose prove much more poignant. In 2003, in Melbourne, Australia, Movember began as an official global charity that aspired to “have an everlasting impact on the face of men’s health.”

In an effort to garner public awareness regarding prostate cancer in men, the charity kick-started a fundraiser in which men would donate $10 to grow a mustache for 30 days. Movember has since found its way to a myriad of other countries. By 2012, 21 nations, including the United States, were engaging in the “no shave” event.

The Movember Foundation has raised $174 million worldwide as of 2012. By registering on Movember.com, participants, called “Mo Bros,” agree to join the movement by growing a mustache for the month of November. Mo Bros raise money by asking friends and family to donate to their efforts. 83.1% of the funds raised in the United States go toward programs and initiatives aimed at fighting prostate and testicular cancers. The remaining funds finance the Movember team’s fundraising and administrative tasks.

According to the American Cancer Society, about 238,590 new cases of prostate cancer have been recorded in the United States in 2013. Prostate cancer remains the most common type of cancer in American men and the second-leading cause of cancer death in men.

“No Shave November is a powerful event because a bunch of men growing facial hair at the same time really draws attention to the fight against prostate cancer,” said sophomore finance and accounting major Tyler Boyles.

“[The event] serves as a mass statement. Yet, as students’ faces sprout various forms of facial hair, they remain largely unaware of the true significance their 'staches carry.

“[Movember] is a fun event, but it’s not pointless,” said freshman math major Stephen Lyons. “It’s important for those who are growing out their facial hair to understand and know that by not shaving, they are supporting men who suffer from prostate cancer.”

Choosing their Dates !! - A Super Joke

A middle age Guy and his Wife, after a big fight mutually decided to make a list of 5 People whom they're allowed to Sleep with if they ever got the opportunity.

She picked
1. Brad Pitt,
2. Hrithik Roshan,
3. Chris Hemsworth,
4. George Clooney
5. Arnold schwarzenegger

He picked
1. Her Sister,
2. Her cousin
3. Wife's Best Friend,
4. their Neighbour's Wife and
5. their Son's Tuition Teacher.

Men are simple like that, they always set Achievable Goals !!!

20 Things No Gentleman should ever do !

20 Things No Gentleman should ever do !

“A gentleman is one who puts more into the world than he takes out” – Theodore Roosevelt

1. Wear something ‘ironically’
Geek glasses, Hawaiian shirts, 80’s retro sportswear, you name it – a gentleman wouldn’t be seen dead in something purely for the sake of ‘irony’, leave this look to the likes of pop-up-store-come-vintage-clothing-come-speakeasy-bar-owners.

2. Get any part of you body pierced
Do what you like in your teenage, ungentlemanly years, but beyond these rebellious times and into the years of being a gentleman, remove all trace of past rebellions and never, we repeat never, pierce a body part.

3. Take up a seat while a less stable person suffers
This is more common manners than anything else, but a gentleman would never sit (on a tube or otherwise) whilst a woman, less-able or elderly person stands.

4. Break your word
A boy speaks, a gentleman acts on his word and stays true to it.

5. Lie
A real gentleman stays loyal, faithful and honest at all times.

6. Spend far too much time in front of the mirror
Vanity is deeply ungentlemanly.

7. Easily forget his roots
No matter how much a gentleman earns, or how much success he has garnered, a real gentleman will stay humble to his past.

8. Kiss and tell
Because a gentleman never tells.

9. Have one too many at a wedding, especially your own
Someone once told me that there is nothing tackier than a drunk bride, but in retrospect this applies as much to gentlemen as it does to brides to be. A gentleman knows his limits.

10. Be too proud to apologise
A true gentleman will apologise after a fight, even if he wasn’t in the wrong.

11. Urinate in public
Unless you’re an 18 year-old having his first beer, there is simply no excuse.

12. Drive recklessly with a woman or child in the car
You are not clever or rebellious. You are dangerous, and not in the cool, ‘rebel without a cause’ way.

13. Get a visible tattoo when you’re far too old to do so
Similar to number 2, it’s best to avoid this one too. If you did get drunk on a beach in Thailand and get your name in Arabic branded across your back, then consider keeping it covered up.

14. Sit cross legged
Unless you’re doing yoga, which is OK by the way, try and avoiding sitting like a child. There is just something strange about seeing a grown man sitting like a schoolboy.

15. Referring to yourself in the third person
Annoying doesn’t even begin to describe how unbecoming this is.

16. Drunk dial
Not classy, just embarrassing. A gentleman does not need to be inebriated to communicate.

17. Cancel at the last minute
A real gentleman makes plans and sticks to them, no matter what.

18. Swear in public
A gentleman would never let his mood dictate his manners.

19. Believe in luck, or chance
A gentleman knows the power of cause and effect.

20. Patronise
Your age does not define your maturity.

A married man's confession - Joke

A married man went into the confessional and said to his priest,

'I almost had an affair with another woman.'

The priest said, 'What do you mean, almost?'

The man said, 'Well, we got undressed and rubbed together, but then I stopped.'

The priest said, 'Rubbing together is the same as putting it in. You're not to see that woman again. For your penance, say five Hail Mary's and put $50 in the poor box.'

The man left the confessional, said his prayers, and then walked over to the poor box.

He paused for a moment and then started to leave.

The priest, who was watching, quickly ran over to him saying, 'I saw that. You didn't put any money in the poor box!'

The man replied, 'Yeah, but I rubbed the $50 on the box, and according to you, that's the same as putting it in!'

'Perfect Body' of a Woman - How Men And Women Differ

In case you needed more fodder for a “depressingly unrealistic body expectations” Pinterest board, lingerie shop Bluebella.com polled 500 men and 500 women to create mashup images illustrating how the sexes differ when it comes to their “perfect body.”

And so began a game of commodifying different celebrities’ body parts to be photoshopped into the super-celebrity body. Here’s the “perfect” woman:

Via : Time

WHY MEN ARE SO HONEST - New Version Story

*WHY MEN ARE SO HONEST*

New Version Story 

If you are female and reading this article then just realize the value of a man; and if male, then feel proud after reading it!

One day, while a woodcutter was cutting a branch of a tree above a river, his axe fell into the river.

When he cried out, the Lord appeared and asked, *"Why are you crying?"*

The woodcutter replied that his axe has fallen into water and he needed it to make a living.

The Lord went down into the water and reappeared with a *Golden Axe*. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked. The woodcutter replied: *"No."

The Lord again went down and came up with a Silver Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked. Again, the woodcutter replied: "No."

The Lord went down again and came up with an Iron Axe. "Is this your axe?" the Lord asked. The woodcutter replied: *"Yes."

The Lord was pleased with the man's honesty and gave him all 3 Axes to keep, and the woodcutter went home happy.

Some time later the woodcutter was walking with his wife along the riverbank, and his wife fell into the river.

When he cried out, the Lord again appeared and asked him: "Why are you crying?"

*"Oh Lord, my wife has fallen into the water!"

The Lord went down into the water and came up with Deepika Padukone.

"Is this your wife?" the Lord asked. 
"Yes," cried the woodcutter.

The Lord was furious. "You lied! That is an untruth!" 
The woodcutter replied, "Oh, forgive me, my Lord. It is a misunderstanding. You see, if I had said 'NO' to  Deepika padukone , you would have come up with KATRINA. Then if I said 'NO' to her, you would have come up with *MY WIFE*. Had I then said 'YES,' you would have given me all 3.*
Lord, I'm a poor man, & not able to take care of 3 wives, so THAT'S why I said YES to Deepika."

The moral of this story is: Whenever a man lies, it is for a *good and honorable reason and for the benefit of others.

That's our story, and we're sticking to it

*MEN ARE TRULY HONORABLE!*
😜😋😝😀😄😜😋😝😃

Who says Men are not important?

1. You can't spell Madam without the Adam in it

2. Neither can you spell Woman without the Man

3. You also cannot spell Female without the Male

4. Not spell She without the He

5. You most definitely cannot spell Mrs without the Mr...

6. ... and finally, in prayers, we continue to say Amen and not A-women

This is to all the wonderful men who rise up to their responsibilities daily...

*Dedicated to All Wonderful MEN*

30 Characteristics of a Good Guy

1. He has integrity and character:  simply put, a good guy is less talk and more action.  The Latin origin of “integrity” means whole, and when it comes to being a good guy, wholesome is sexy.  Everywhere he goes, he leaves a mark.
2. He’s balanced:  family and friends always comes first.  He prioritizes his time and is well-rounded in many areas.  He’s a modern Renaissance man.
3. He’s confident:  this doesn’t mean cocky at all.  He has a good self-image about himself and believes he deserves the best.
4. He’s courageous:  he goes after what he wants even in the presence of self-doubt.  He’s not afraid to approach women and spark conversation.
5. He listens:  the good guy doesn’t care about the sound of his voice.  He doesn’t interrupt and he follows the rule that 75% of the time should be listening vs. talking.
6. He takes initiative:  the good guy is a leader, and takes the first step in a group setting and in a relationship.
7. He’s detail-oriented:  as tough as it is for a man, the good guy tries to stay on top of it and is organized.  When it comes to pursuing the girl of his dreams, he knows the little things count the most.
8. He has self-respect and gives respect to all:  he focuses on the kind of man he wants to be, and creates a positive internal self-dialogue.  A good guy is empathetic and forgiving.
9. He challenges himself to be a better man:  most men are raised to believe they need to fight and conquer.  A good guy understands to overcome one’s own self is better than competing and beating anyone else.
10. He’s committed and faithful:  he says what he means, and means what he says. He follows through with his word even with people who don’t follow through with theirs.  He’s loyal in relationship.
11. He fights against injustice:  when a good guy sees another guy act out of line with a female, he thinks it could be his own sister, mother or daughter, and steps in to fight the injustice, even if it’s his own friend that’s causing the problem.
12. He’s honest:  the truth can hurt, but it’s also the beginning of the healing process.  A good guy understands honesty might be tough up front, but the impact is far less than the outcome of long running white lies.
13. He’s good with his money:  he makes decisions to plan for the future, and makes a budget for himself.
14. He has good humor:  he doesn’t take himself too seriously, and is happy to be the pun of everyone’s joke.
15. He’s humble:  he lets others sing his praises instead of himself.
16. He’s a team player:  he understands the team’s success is his success, and cares more about the team winning than his own ego.
17. He’s adaptable:  things don’t always go his way, but he picks himself up and tries again.  Throw him in any scene, and he’s comfortable.
18. He has good manners:  his actions are made with care and consideration.
19. He’s always learning:  the good guy loves life, and seeks to make the most out of it.  He reads at least one book a month.
20. He’s shaped by men he respects:  he finds mentors, men he wants to be like, and regularly meets with them.
21. He has true and close friendships:  he keeps a tight brotherhood around him and understands “iron sharpens iron as man sharpens man.”
22. He has a desire to advance culture:  when he leaves the world, it will be a better place.
23. He has temperance (moderate in action, thought, feeling and yup alcohol):  he’s not the wild and out of control guy at the party.  The good guy is the one who carries him home on his shoulders.  He thinks before he acts, and doesn’t let him emotions get the best of him.
24. He supports and promotes moral excellence:  he knows what’s right and wrong.  The good guy is the one who helps an elderly lady carry her groceries to her car.
25. He seeks peace when possible:  he confronts in private, but he’s never a doormat.  The confidence in himself is unwavering in tough times.
26. He improves his physical health:  he knows his body is a temple, and works to improve his health and his image.
27. He has a vision to lead:  with long-term thinking, the good guy leads with the realization his actions today will affect his life and others in the future.
28. He has gratitude:  he works hard, and is thankful for everything he receives.
29. He knows the importance of family:  not only is he concerned with the legacy he will leave, but he honors the legacy he has received and the traditions of his ancestors.
30. He believes in his Creator:  he starts his day in prayer, and stops and listens for his next steps.

37 Rules all Men Must Know...

You don’t have to agree with these rules but these are all characteristics of a good man.

1. Know what you want. Don’t go around asking for approval.
2. Always love and respect your parents.
3. Never cheat on your girlfriend/wife.
4. On the bus always give up your seat to the elderly, pregnant women, and mothers with their kids.
5. Don’t lend money to your family. Give it.
6. Don’t put others down.
7. Don’t participate in gossip.
8. Exercise.
9. At the gym wear nice clothes. You will interact with a lot of different kinds of professionals there and first impressions are everything.
10. Don’t ever take selfies.
11. In emails and texts don’t use short form.
12. No matter how mad you may be at your family, keep it in the family.
13. Don’t brag.
14. Listen. Girls like to talk about themselves.
15. Never use the term: “Shit happens.” Put in more efforts into comforting that person.
16. If talking to someone you don’t want to, make a polite excuse and leave.
17. Never talk religion with anyone. Keep it to yourself.
18. Don’t follow others.
19. Don’t waste your life away being on your phone and computer all the time.
20. When making plans, call. Don’t text.
21. Know how to fix things around the house.
22. Don’t be intimidated by anyone.
23. Know how to fight.
24. Have hobbies.
25. Don’t be afraid to go and watch a movie alone.
26. Learn to be patient and relaxed.
27. Never stop learning new skills.
28. Read books and keep the mind fresh.
29. Read the newspaper.
30. You don’t need a reason to buy your mom flowers.
31. Never split the check. Always pay it.
32. Play chess at least twice a week. Keeps the mind super fresh.
33. Buy your mom flowers for no reason.
34. Own a pair of expensive sunglasses, gloves and nice scarf.
35. Own at least two nice watches.
36. Use a money clip. Not a wallet.
37. Don’t buy things you can’t afford.

Men Will Be Men !!!

One day a woman wanted to know how the husband would react if she left without telling him where she had gone. 

So she decided to write him a letter saying she is tired of him and didn't want to live with him anymore and after writing she put the letter on the table in the bedroom and then hid under the bed...

When the husband came back home, saw the letter and read it, he replied on the same paper and then began to sing and dance changing his clothes. He got his phone, dialled someone then said: "Hey babe, am just changing clothes then will join you, as for the other fool it has finally dawned on her that I was fooling around with her and has left. I was wrong..really wrong to have married her, I wish I had known you earlier. See you soon honey!" The husband walked out of the room and left. In tears and very upset, the woman got up from under the bed and decided to go and read what the husband wrote on the letter. 

When she got the letter, it said: "I COULD see your feet under the bed, I didn't make any phone call.. I am going to buy bread. Stand up, stop your silly games and prepare me a meal....

I LOVE YOU!"

36 Rules all Men Must Know

These are the 37 Rules all Men Must Know...

You don’t have to agree with these rules but these are all characteristics of a good man.

1. Know what you want. Don’t go around asking for approval.
2. Always love and respect your parents.
3. Never cheat on your girlfriend/wife.
4. On the bus always give up your seat to the elderly, pregnant women, and mothers with their kids.
5. Don’t lend money to your family. Give it.
6. Don’t put others down.
7. Don’t participate in gossip.
8. Exercise.
9. At the gym wear nice clothes. You will interact with a lot of different kinds of professionals there and first impressions are everything.
10. Don’t ever take selfies.
11. In emails and texts don’t use short form.
12. No matter how mad you may be at your family, keep it in the family.
13. Don’t brag.
14. Listen. Girls like to talk about themselves.
15. Never use the term: “Shit happens.” Put in more efforts into comforting that person.
16. If talking to someone you don’t want to, make a polite excuse and leave.
17. Never talk religion with anyone. Keep it to yourself.
18. Don’t follow others.
19. Don’t waste your life away being on your phone and computer all the time.
20. When making plans, call. Don’t text.
21. Know how to fix things around the house.
22. Don’t be intimidated by anyone.
23. Know how to fight.
24. Have hobbies.
25. Don’t be afraid to go and watch a movie alone.
26. Learn to be patient and relaxed.
27. Never stop learning new skills.
28. Read books and keep the mind fresh.
29. Read the newspaper.
30. You don’t need a reason to buy your mom flowers.
31. Never split the check. Always pay it.
32. Play chess at least twice a week. Keeps the mind super fresh.
33. Own a pair of expensive sunglasses, gloves and nice scarf.
34. Own at least two nice watches.
35. Use a money clip. Not a wallet.
36. Don’t buy things you can’t afford.

45 Ultimate Tips For Men

1. Buy high quality tools, so you only have to buy them once.
2. Keep a change of clothes at work.
3. Never hit anyone unless they are an immediate threat.
4. Every hat should serve a purpose.
5. Never take her to the movies on the first date.
6. Learn to wet shave.
7. Nothing looks more bad ass than a well-tailored suit.
8. Shave with the grain on the first go-around.
9. Always look a person in the eye when you talk to them.
10. Buy a plunger before you need a plunger.
11. Exercise makes you happy. Run, lift, and play sports.
12. Brush your teeth before you put on your tie.
13. A small amount of your paycheck should go directly to your savings account every month.
14. Call Mom and Dad every week.
15. Never wear a clip-on tie.
16. Give a firm handshake.
17. Compliment her shoes.
18. Never leave a beer unfinished.
19. If you aren’t confident, fake it. It will come around.
20. You can tell the size of a man by the size of things that bother him.
21. Be conscious of your body language.
22. The only reason to ever point a gun at someone is if you intend to shoot them. Period.
23. Always stand to shake someone’s hand.
24. Never lend anything you can’t afford to lose.
25. Ask more than you answer. Everybody likes to talk about themselves.
26. Never have sex with anyone that doesn’t want it as much as you.
27. Go for women out of your league. You may end up surprised.
28. Manliness is not only being able to take care of yourself, but others as well.
29. Go with the decision that will make for a good story.
30. When you walk, look straight ahead, not at your feet.
31. Nice guys don’t finish last, boring guys do.
32. Find your passion and figure out how to get paid for it.
33. Don’t let the little head do the thinking for the big head.
34. No matter their job or status, everyone deserves your respect.
35. The most important thing you can learn is personal responsibility. Bad things happen, it’s your job to overcome them.
36. The first one to get angry loses.
37. A man does what needs to be done without complaining.
38. Never stop learning.
39. Always go out into public dressed like you’re about to meet the love of your life.
40. Don’t change yourself just to make someone happy.
41. If you’re the smartest person in the room, you’re in the wrong room.
42. Luck favors the prepared.
43. Women find confidence sexy as hell.
44. Do whatever you want to do, but be the best at it.
45. No one is on their deathbed wishing they spent more time at work.

Men !!! - Before and After Marriage

Men !!! - Before and After Marriage

Because I'm a Man..

Because I'm a man, when I lock my keys in the car I will fiddle with a
wire long  after hypothermia has set in. The AAA is not an option. I will win.
_______________________________________________
Because I'm a man, when the car isn't running very well, I will pop
the hood and stare at the engine as if I know what I'm looking at. If another man
shows up, one  of us will say to the other, "I used to be able to fix these things,
but now with all these computers and everything, I wouldn't, know where to start."
We will then drink beer and break wind as a form of holy communion.
_______________________________________________
Because I'm a man, when I catch a cold, I need someone to bring me
soup and take care of me while I lie in bed and moan. You're a woman. You never get
as sick as I do, so for you this isn't a problem.
_______________________________________________
Because I'm a man, I can be relied upon to purchase basic groceries at
the store, like milk or bread. I cannot be expected to find exotic items like
"cumin" or "tofu." For all I know, these are the same thing. And never, under any
circumstances, expect me to pick up anything for which "feminine hygiene product" is
a euphemism. (For your information guys, cumin is a spice and not a bodily function.
_______________________________________________
Because I'm a man, when one of our appliances stops working, I will
insist on taking it apart, despite evidence that this will just cost me twice as much,
once the repair person gets here and has to put it back together.
__________________________________________ ______
Because I'm a man, I must hold the television ion remote control in my
hand while I watch TV. If the thing has been misplaced, I may miss a whole show
looking for it (though one time I was able to survive by holding a
calculator).....applies to engineers mainly.
_________________________________________________
Because I'm a man, there is no need to ask me what I'm thinking about.
The answer is always either sex, trucks, or football. I have to make up something
else when you ask, so don't ask.
_______________________________________________
Because I'm a man, I do not want to visit your mother, 
or have your mother come visit us,
or talk to her when she calls, or think about her any more than I have to.
Whatever you got her for Mother's Day is okay; I don't need to see it.
And don't forget to pick up something for my mother, too.
_________________________________________ ______
Because I'm a man, you don't have to ask me if I liked the movie.
Chances are, if you're crying at the end of it, I didn't.... 
and if you are feeling amorous afterwards,
then I will certainly remember the name and recommend it to others.
______________ _________________________________
Because I'm a man, I think what you're wearing is fine. I thought what
you were wearing five minutes ago was fine, too. Either pair of shoes is fine.
With the belt or without it, looks fine. Your hair is fine. You look fine. 
Can we just go now?
_______________________________________________
Because I'm a man, and this is, after all, the year 2004, I will share
equally in the housework. You just do the laundry, the cooking, the cleaning, the
vacuuming, and the dishes, and I'll do the rest.....like wandering around in the
garden with a beer wondering what to do.
____________________________________________
This has been a public service message for Women to better understand the Male

;)

What Colors Should you use in Marketing?

What Colors Should you use in Marketing?

From Visually.

Things youll never hear a man say

16 Things You Didn't Know about 'Play Boy' Hugh Hefner...

16 Things You Didn't Know about Hugh Hefner... infographic

Married Men Wanted

A factory had a policy of hiring only married men. 

Concerned about this, a local Woman's Liberation Front Leader called on the CEO and asked him,  "Why is it you limit your employees to married men? Is it because you consider women as weak, dumb, cantankerous, or do you consider us as tantrum throwers, bossy, etc.,?"

 "Not at all, Ma'am," the CEO replied. "It is because our Policy is to hire staff who are used to obeying orders without questioning, who are accustomed to being shoved around, know how to keep their mouths shut and put up with anything when I yell at them."

Single are you? - joke

Man walks into a supermarket and buys :1 bar of soap1 toothbrush1 tube toothpaste1 loaf of bread 1 pint of milk1 single serving cereal1 single serving frozen dinner The girl at the checkout looks at him and says "Single are you? "The man replies very sarcastically "How did you guess? "She replies "because you're ugly. "

100 Cool Things About Being A GUY..

100 Cool Things About Being A Guy 1. Phone conversations are over in 30 seconds flat. 2. Movie nudity is virtually always female. 3. You know stuff about tanks. 4. A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase. 5. Monday Night Football. 6. You don't have to monitor your friends' sex lives. 7. Your bathroom lines are 80% shorter. 8. You can open all of your own jars. 9. Old friends don't give a crap whether you've lost or gained weight. 10. Dry cleaners and haircutters don't rob you blind. 11. When clicking through the channels, you don't have to stall at every shot of somebody crying. 12. Your ass is never a factor in a job interview. 13. All your orgasms are real. 14. A beer gut does not make you invisible to the opposite sex. 15. Guy in hockey masks don't attack you ... unless you're playing hockey. 16. You don't have to lug a bag full of stuff around everywhere you go. 17. You understand why the movie "Stripes" is funny. 18. You can go to the bathroom without a support group. 19. Your last name stays put. 20. You can leave the hotel bed unmade. 21. When your work is criticized, you don't have to panic that everyone secretly hates you. 22. You can kill your own food. 23. The garage is all yours. 24. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness. 25. You see the humor in "Terms of Endearment." 26. Nobody secretly wonders whether you swallow. 27. You never have to clean a toilet. 28. You can be showered and ready to go in 10 minutes. 29. Sex means never worrying about your reputation. 30. Wedding plans take care of themselves. 31. If someone forgets to invite you to something, he or she can still be your friend. 32. Your underwear is $10 for a three-pack. 33. The National College Cheerleading Championship 34. None of your coworkers has the power to make you cry. 35. You don't have to shave below your neck. 36. You don't have to curl up next to a hairy butt every night. 37. If you're 34 and single, nobody even notices. 38. You can write your name in the snow. 39. You can get into a nontrivial pissing contest. 40. Everything on your face gets to stay its original color. 41. Chocolate is just another snack. 42. You can be president. 43. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger's seat. 44. Flowers fix everything. 45. You never have to worry about other people's feelings. 46. You get to think about sex 90% of your waking hours. 47. You can wear a white shirt to a water park. 48. Three pairs of shoes is more than enough. 49. You can eat a banana in a hardware store. 50. You can say anything and not worry about what people think. 51. Foreplay is optional. 52. Michael Bolton doesn't live in your universe. 53. Nobody stops telling a good dirty joke when you walk into a room. 54. You can whip your shirt off on a hot day. 55. You don't have to clean your apartment if the meter reader's coming by. 56. You never feel compelled to stop a pal from getting laid. 57. Car mechanics tell you the truth. 58. You don't give a rat's butt if anyone notices your new haircut. 59. You can quietly watch a game with you buddy for hours without ever thinking, "He must be mad at me." 60. The world is your urinal. 61. You never misconstrue innocuous statements to mean your lover's about to leave you. 62. You get to jump up and slap stuff. 63. Hot wax never comes near your pubic area. 64. One mood, all the time. 65. You can admire Clint Eastwood without starving yourself to look like him. 66. You never have to drive on to another gas station because "this one's just too gross." 67. You know at least 20 ways to open a beer bottle. 68. You can sit with you knees apart no matter what you're wearing. 69. Same work...more pay! 70. Gray hair and wrinkles only add character. 71. You don't have to leave the room to make an emergency crotch adjustment. 72. Wedding dress: $2,000; tuxedo rental: $75. 73. You don't care if someone's talking about you behind your back. 74. With 400 million sperm per shot, you could double the Earth's population in 15 tries, at least in theory. 75. You don't mooch off of other's desserts. 76. If you retain water, it's in a canteen. 77. The remote control is yours and yours alone. 78. People never glance at your chest when you're talking to them. 79. ESPN's SportsCenter. 80. You can drop by to see a friend without having to bring a little gift. 81. Bachelor parties whomp ass over bridal showers. 82. You have a normal and healthy relationship with your mother. 83. You can buy condoms without the shopkeeper imagining you naked. 84. You needn't pretend you're "Freshening up" to go to the bathroom. 85. If you don't call your buddy when you say you will, he won't tell your other friends you've changed. 86. Someday you'll be a dirty old man. 87. You can rationalize any behavior with the handy phrase "Screw it." 88. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you just might become lifelong buddies. 89. Princess Di's death was just another obituary. 90. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected. 91. You never have to miss a sexual opportunity because you're not in the mood. 92. You think the idea of punting a small dog is funny. 93. If something mechanical doesn't work, you can bash it with a hammer or throw it across the room. 94. New shoes don't blister, cut, and mangle your feet. 95. Porn movies are designed with your mind in mind. 96. You don't have to remember everyone's birthdays and anniversaries. 97. Not liking a person won't stop you from having great sex with them. 98. Your pals can be trusted never to trap you with: "So...notice anything different?" 99. Baywatch 100. There's always a game on somewhere