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Showing posts with label politician jokes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label politician jokes. Show all posts

Sunday, January 7, 2018

Freedom ! - A 1980s American & Russian Joke

Freedom ! - A 1980s American & Russian Joke



An American and a Russian were discussing their respective freedoms in the 1980's...


American: We have more freedom. I can go over to the president and say "Mr. Reagan, I don't like the way you are running this country".

Russian: What's the big deal in that? I too can go to my president and say "Mr. President, I don't like the way Reagan is running his country".

Friday, August 11, 2017

Winston Churchill - A Fool ?

Winston Churchill - A Fool ?


During WW II, a man was arrested in London for calling Winston Churchill a fool.

The next day in the House of Commons, the opposition members were ready to roast the government for this. "Are we living in a police state", they shouted, "where we cannot call the PM a fool"?

Churchill's reply was truly disarming - "The man was not arrested for calling the Prime Minister a fool", he said, "but for letting out a state secret at a time of war".
πŸ‘

Thats the real sense of Humour..πŸ‘ŒπŸΌπŸ˜

Monday, January 9, 2017

Politicians !!!!

Politicians accident

A bus load of politicians were driving down a country road one afternoon, when all of a sudden, the bus ran off the road and crashed into a tree in an old farmer's field.
Seeing what happened, the old farmer went over to investigate. He then proceeded to dig a hole and bury the politicians.
A few days later, the local sheriff came out, saw the crashed bus, and asked the old farmer, "Were they all dead?"
The old farmer replied, "Well, some of them said they weren't, but you know how them politicians lie."

Tuesday, November 8, 2016

Trump vs Clinton Jokes


"If it comes down to Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton, if the vote was today, Trump would be in trouble. Clinton leads Trump in a hypothetical matchup 54 percent to 36 percent. While 68 percent of likely general election voters view Donald Trump negatively and the other 32 percent don't have Twitter or television." –Jimmy Kimmel

"Analysts say Hillary Clinton's plan to defeat Donald Trump involves painting Trump as 'dangerous and bigoted.' She plans on doing this by quoting Trump accurately." –Conan O'Brien

"Now that the election is narrowing to a two-person race, Donald Trump said he will have to get used to Hillary Clinton's shouting. After hearing this, Bill Clinton said, 'You never really get used to it.'" –Conan O'Brien
"In his campaign against Hillary Clinton, Donald Trump says he's going to start quoting some of Bernie Sanders' speeches. Which means Trump's opening line will now be, 'My nurse is stealing from me.'" –Conan O'Brien

"Yesterday, Donald Trump said, 'If I lose, I don't think you'll ever see me again.' So finally, a Trump campaign promise we can all get behind." –Conan O'Brien
"According to a new poll that just came out, 50 percent of Republicans say they could support Donald Trump. The other 50 percent are a group calling themselves 'Women.'" –Conan O'Brien
"A restaurant in Pennsylvania has started selling a pizza inspired by Hillary Clinton topped with buffalo chicken and hot sauce. They also have a Trump pizza, it doesn't have any toppings but the crust is folded over to hide it." –Seth Meyers
 "Hillary Clinton has been attacking Donald Trump over his 'country club' lifestyle. Hillary made the remarks during a speech none of us could afford to attend." –Conan O'Brien
"Last night, CNN hosted a town hall with Republican front-runner Donald Trump, and at one point he complained that the rules of the election are stacked against him 'by the establishment.' You gotta give it to Trump. He's the only man who could inherit millions of dollars, have his name on buildings, and still go, 'Life is totally unfair!'" –Jimmy Fallon

"The Hillary Clinton campaign believes that Donald Trump is going to go after her occasional 'health problems.' Today, Hillary reminded Trump that being a woman over 40 is not a 'health problem.'" –Conan O'Brien

"According to reports, two of Donald Trump's children will not be able to vote at New York's primary because they failed to register before the deadline. So I guess you just lost two votes, Ted Cruz." –Seth Meyers

"After losing in Wisconsin, there has been a big shake-up in the Trump campaign staff. In fact, the guy in charge of racist comments is now in charge of sexist comments." –Conan O'Brien

"If Donald Trump and Hillary Clinton are the two nominees, it will be the first time both parties' nominees are over 65 years old. Which should explain that one debate where they just play checkers in the park. 'King me!'" –Jimmy Fallon

"Trump and Hillary would be the oldest nominees since 1848. Or as Bernie Sanders put it, 'My first campaign!'" –Jimmy Fallon

"Donald Trump said yesterday that a lot of politicians who say they're against him in public are secretly supporting his campaign. Or as Hillary Clinton put it, 'Guilty!'" –Jimmy Fallon

"Donald Trump says that if he is president, he will punish women who have abortions, although he doesn't yet know what that punishment would be. You know, aside from Donald Trump being the president." –Conan O'Brien

"A new poll found that the majority of millennials would vote for Hillary Clinton over Donald Trump. Then millennials found out you can't vote by texting and said, 'Never mind!'" –Jimmy Fallon
"Trump's family was also at the town hall, and Trump's daughter Ivanka was asked if the election is straining her friendship with Chelsea Clinton. Which means we have officially begun the presidential campaign of 2032, everybody!" –Jimmy Fallon

Source : about.com

Tuesday, September 6, 2016

Aiyo Siri Lanka (Sirisena)


A journalist, who was fed up with the Sri Lankan Economy, decided to ask views of President Sirisena on sports instead of Sri Lankan economy. He asked "Dear Mr. President, which game do you like". 
President replied "Cricket". Journalist further asked, which part of Cricket do you like, I mean batting or bowling ? "
The President replied "No, No, I LIKE THE TOSS AT THE BEGINNING OF THE MATCH ". Journalist was confused and asked "Why, only toss, Sir". 

President smiled and said " BECAUSE IT IS THE ONLY TIME WHEN I SEE OUR RUPEE GOING UP"
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