January Jokes

January Jokes 

Dilbert's one liners

*Dilbert's one liners:*

1. I say no to alcohol, it just doesn't listen. 😀😊☺

2. A friend in need is a pest indeed.

3. Marriage is one of the chief causes of divorce.😁😔😗

4. Work is fine if it doesn't take too much of your time. 😝😛

5. When everything comes in your way you're in the wrong lane. 😊😍

6. The light at the end of the tunnel may be an incoming train.. 😄😃

7. Born free, taxed to death. 😃😀

8. Everyone has a photographic memory, some just don't have film.

9. Life is unsure; always eat your dessert first. 😙😜☺

10. Smile, it makes people wonder what you are thinking. 😊☺😍

11. If you keep your feet firmly on the ground, you'll have trouble putting on yourpants. 🌿🌾🍄😄😃😍

12. It's not hard to meet expenses, they are everywhere. 🌷🌿🌹

13. I love being a writer... what I can't stand is the paperwork. 🍁💐🌸

14. A printer consists of 3 main parts: the case, the jammed paper tray and theblinking red light.🌸🍂🌰

15. The guy who invented the first wheel was an idiot. The guy who invented theother three, he was the genius.🌹🌻🌺

16. The trouble with being punctual is that no one is there to appreciate it.

17. In a country of free speech, why are there phone bills? 🌸🍂🌿

18.. If you cannot change your mind, are you sure you have one? 🍀🌿🌹

19. Beat the 5 O'clock rush, leave work at noon!💐🌸🌷

20. If you can't convince them, confuse them. 💐😜👍

21. It's not the fall that kills you. It's the sudden stop at the end. 😨🌺🌲

22. I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder. 😜😀😃

23. Hot glass looks same as cold glass. - Cunino's Law of Burnt Fingers

24. The cigarette does the smoking you are just the sucker. 🌺🌻🌷

25. Someday is not a day of the week

26.. Whenever I find the key to success, someone changes the lock.

27. To Err is human, to forgive is not a Company policy.💃🍄

28. The road to success.... Is always under construction. 💐🍃

29. Alcohol doesn't solve any problems, but if you think again, neither does Milk. 😖😀

30. In order to get a Loan, you first need to prove that you don't need it.

And the Best!

31. All the desirable things in life are either illegal, expensive, fattening or married to someone else! 😜😃

The Cost of Being Batman

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