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Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts
Showing posts with label sex. Show all posts

Thursday, January 18, 2018

Free Sex Tonight !!!


I asked a Chinese girl for her number. 



She said, "Sex! Sex! Sex! Free sex tonight!" 
I said, "Wow!" 

Then her friend said, "She means 666-3629."

Friday, December 22, 2017

Sex with the priest's wife

Sex with the priest's wife.



Jack goes to his buddy Bob and says ... "I'm sleeping with the priest's wife. Can you hold him in church for an hour after mass for me?" The friend doesn't like it but being a buddy, he agrees. After mass, 

Bob starts talking to the priest, asking him all sorts of stupid questions, just to keep him occupied. Finally the priest gets annoyed and asks him what he's really up to. 

Bob feeling guilty, finally confesses to the priest... "My friend is sleeping with your wife right now, so he asked me to keep you occupied."

The priest smiles, puts a brotherly hand on Bob's shoulder and says... "You better hurry home now. My wife died a year ago".


Thursday, February 23, 2017

"Sex breaks" for Office staff proposed by Swedish politician


Workers in a small town in northern Sweden could get more productive after a councillor's proposal for staff 'sex breaks'.
The idea of one-hour paid breaks for workers to go home and get intimate is aimed at improving Swedish couples' relationships, local politician Per-Erik Muskos says.
"There are studies that show sex is healthy," he told AFP news agency.
Couples aren't spending enough time with each other in today's busy world, he says.
He did point out there was no way to prove workers would take the opportunity to jump in the sack, but says they should be trusted with the break.
"You can't guarantee that a worker doesn't go out for a walk instead," he told AFP.
Swedish employees have an envied work-life balance. After Finland and France, they work the fewest hours, compared with the rest of Europe. In 2015, they worked an average of 1685 hours per year.
Newshub.

Friday, February 10, 2017

Old Couple and SEX - Joke


An older couple, who were both widowed, had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements, and so on. Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship. "How do you feel about s*x?" he asked, rather tentatively. "I would like it infrequently ", she replied. The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment, adjusted his glasses, then leaned over towards her and whispered, "Is that one word or two?"

Tuesday, February 7, 2017

Shadow sex

Shadow Sex


Tuesday, January 24, 2017

12 Yoga Poses That Double As Sex Positions

10 Yoga Poses That Double As Sex Positions


Ancient Yogic masters surely knew how sex treats the body and the soul. Here are 10 Yoga poses that can also be used as sex positions!
Source: http://9gag.com/gag/aeYQpEm















Monday, January 23, 2017

Blogging !!


Wednesday, January 11, 2017

Rules of Sex ! - One Good Joke


Typical macho man married typical good-looking lady and after the wedding, he laid down the following rules: 
"I'll be home when I want, if I want and at what time I want and I don't expect any hassle from you. I expect a great dinner to be on table unless I tell you that I won't be home for dinner. I'll go hunting, fishing, boozing and card-playing when I want with my old buddies and don't you give me a hard time about it. Those are my rules. Any comments?"
His new bride said, "No, that's fine with me. Just understand that there will be sex here at seven o'clock every night... whether you're here or not."

Tuesday, January 10, 2017

Charges for Love !! - Joke


A young man and his date were parked on a back road some distance from town. They were about to have sex when the girl stopped. “I really should have mentioned this earlier, but I’m actually a hooker and I charge $20 for sex.” The man reluctantly paid her, and they did their thing. After a cigarette, the man just sat in the driver’s seat looking out the window. “Why aren’t we going anywhere?” asked the girl. “Well, I should have mentioned this before, but I’m actually a taxi driver, and the fare back to town is $25…”

Monday, December 19, 2016

A Daughter's doubt !!! - Joke


A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her daughter walks in. “Mother, where do babies come from?” The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, “Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug, and have sex.” The daughter looks puzzled so the mother continues, “That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommy’s vagina. That’s how you get a baby, honey.” The child seems to comprehend. “Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddy’s penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?” “Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry.”

Friday, September 23, 2016

Perfect Kissing Guide, Even For Experienced Kissers

Perfect Kissing Guide, Even For Experienced Kissers


1. Kissing It Softly

Start kissing slowly, gently and passionately. After that, keep it up.


2. The Strawberry Kiss

Recent studies indicate that eating a strawberry before kissing will make your kissing experience into a real magic, as the strawberry have a huge impact on your lips sweet sensor.

3. Love Is Hurt

Use your other body parts while you kiss. Touch her/his hair, hold him/her back, touch his muscles and more. This action releases tons of endorphins, which makes you feel so good...


4. Nibble It a Little Bit

Nibble each other lips (gently of course) will boost your kissing experience and even the after kissing celebrations...

5. Moisturize Your Kiss

It's well known that dry lips will destroy every kiss, avoid it by using some lip moisture once in awhile.

6. Hip, Lip - Hop!

Get your hips closer, it will ignite some fire between you... Smoking!

7. Same Same But Different

Mimic each other "moves", whether s/he bite your lips, puting the tongue inside and more.


8. Tongue It Up

Take your tongue for a ride over your partner's front teeth. It might sound disgusting, but you should expect for an overwhelming response.

9. Lips Is The Obvious

Kiss on other body parts as well - neck, shoulders, ears.... it's up to you.

10. Keep It Fresh

No matter which tactic you are using, nothing will work if your teeth will be smelly and dirty. Brush your teeth twice a day! (At least...)


http://www.viralands.com/

Monday, March 25, 2013

16 Things You Didn't Know about 'Play Boy' Hugh Hefner...

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