I'm looking for my car - Joke

A drunken man was wondering around the parking lot of a bar, bumping into every car and then rubbing the roofs of the cars.
The manager comes out of the bar and stops the guy. "What the heck are you doing? " he asks the drunk. "I'm looking for my car, and I can't find it. " "So how does feeling the roof help you? " He asked the drunk. "Well," the drunk replied. "MY car has two blue lights and a siren on the roof!! "

Married Men Wanted

A factory had a policy of hiring only married men. 

Concerned about this, a local Woman's Liberation Front Leader called on the CEO and asked him,  "Why is it you limit your employees to married men? Is it because you consider women as weak, dumb, cantankerous, or do you consider us as tantrum throwers, bossy, etc.,?"

 "Not at all, Ma'am," the CEO replied. "It is because our Policy is to hire staff who are used to obeying orders without questioning, who are accustomed to being shoved around, know how to keep their mouths shut and put up with anything when I yell at them."

Short humor jokes-Absent minded

Short humor jokes-Absent minded

--> Absent-minded professor - Heavens! someone stole my wallet.
Wife- Did'nt you feel a hand in your pocket?
Professor- I did, but I thought it was mine

--> Did you hear about the absent-minded doctor who, on his wedding day, when it came to put the ring on the wife's finger, started checking the pulse rate and asked her to stick out her tongue?

--> Nurse - You've just become the father of a baby boy!
Professor - Don't tell my wife, I want to surprise her.

--> Did you hear about the absent-minded who stood in front of the mirror for hours together wondering where he had seen himself before.